Hi Everyone
This week I had a great idea. I drew my private pensions when I retired now almost twenty years ago but as they were not inflation prove, the spending power of those pensions has now almost halved and that does not include the additional cost of energy or the fact that the cost of food is well above the official inflation rate. In the last seven months, I have made telephone calls to a government department asking why they have not sent me a sum of money that they say they owe me. On each call, I patiently waited for up to 45 minutes before a real person answered, and each time I have been told that I will receive a cheque within 10 to 15 working days. When I phoned around Christmas I was told that a payment had been sent to me last September but they agreed when I said that I had not received a cheque. I was then again told that I would receive my cheque in 10 working days. Again nothing happened so last week I phoned yet again to be told that when a lost cheque needs to be reissued, it takes 16 weeks before being told that I should finally receive my payment at the beginning of May, 10 months after they told me that they owed me some money. The obvious question is in this computer age that we are all supposed to embrace, when I asked why the payment cannot be paid electronically into my account I was told by, don't forget a government department, that "we only send it by post. That same government department accepts electronic payments when you owe them money. Anyway, all this Rubbish led me to my great idea. I need a job to supplement my falling standard of living but one that I can do from home without even changing out of my dressing gown. Yes, you have guessed it, I can sit at home by my telephone leaving callers waiting for 45 minutes before giving them the benefit of my advise and information while assuring them that all will be well. They will not know that I am approaching middle age or that I am still in my dressing gown. Neither will they be aware that I probably do not know what I am talking about or that I am giving them misinformation. Even better, I can be certain that when my frustrated client phones back a few weeks later to complain, they will get someone else to shout, at after another 45 minute wait of course. I will have to go now to download the application form but now I read that people who are over 50 and who have taken early retirement (early retirement at 50!!) are being encouraged back to work by our government but apparently most employers prefer to employ younger people. What a crazy situation when many employers are crying out for skilled and reliable workers. Perhaps I should not bother with the application form after all. They have no idea what they are missing.
Back in the 1980s, I was the Project Manager on the first office block built on the local Festival Park. There was a small lake next to the site and, guess what, there were ducks swimming on it. It did however include one special duck and it was even recorded in the site meeting minutes that we should do everything possible to make sure that the duck was protected from harm. Quackers. It was the only duck that wandered onto the site, waiting outside the site office for a free meal. All was well until one day this large ready mixed concrete lorry driven by a driver who had not read the minutes drove onto the site and, sadly the duck was no more. The aftermath of that incident was worse than if one of the workers on site had been killed. This week a bust of the most famous local man in our history - Josiah Wedgwood - has been demolished on the same site by contractors widening a road. This time made the regional news and the local council is "horrified" although they must have known that the road was being widened. Unusually, the bust was built in local bricks so now they are looking for a local bricklayer who is good at jigsaws so that Josiah can be reborn. No such luck for the duck.
Just a Thought:
There was a film on tv this week that ducks like to watch. You've got it, it was a duckumentary.
My friend was making pottery when he fell asleep. When he woke up his head was spinning.
Thank goodness. That's January done.
Brian
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