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brianmate

September News and Blues



Hi Everyone



The Main Contractor really enjoys the police and spy dramas on TV especially as we are looking forward to the Autumn evenings, even though on some occasions she is struggling with the complexities of the plot. Even worse is that on many of these shows we have to wait a whole week between episodes which is another challenge when we struggle to recall what we did two days ago. Now detective Dot has been applying her accumulated skills in solving a problem close to home. As some of you will know, we live on an unmade lane,and we have slowly negotiated the bumps and holes in our car for the last 40+ years. The result is that apart from a few delivery vehicles, most of the vehicles using the lane are our neighbours. That was until recently when detective Dot spotted a large black van passing our Bedroom window late at night at about the same time. Obviously, this was something needing urgent attention. Following a week of observing from the shadows, she watched as the van one night disappeared into our neighbour's drive before reappearing a few minutes later. As it then passed our window, the investigation ended when she realised that the nocturnal driver of the van was the local milkman, denying detective Dot the excitement of blue flashing lights and armed police in our peaceful lane. Unless of course he was carrying some illegal goods and using the milk van as a front. I hope that Dot does not read this Rubbish otherwise she will be back on surveillance duty at our bedroom window.



No doubt many governments are desperate to come up with ideas on how to cope with the looming energy crisis this winter. In addition, Covid and flu are waiting to return from their summer holidays. This month we will again be queuing to have our flu and Covid jabs in the hope that we will continue to be fit and healthy. In a few days' time, our new Prime Minister will have a master plan to try to convince us that everything will be alright. Almost every 'expert' and economist will have the ultimate 'master plan'. As an interested bystander, I have come up with my own 'ultimate plan' which I am considering sending to our new Prime Minister. The idea is aimed mainly at those who, like me, are approaching middle age so that when we go for our winter jabs you will get a bonus item, a hibernation pill. The idea is that you take it at the beginning of October and you then wake up again at the end of March. Just imagine the benefits, no bills to pay, a welcome break from politics, and as the state pension payments build up it might be possible to have a holiday next year. If you cannot miss Christmas, just move it to the 25th September, it will be just as good and far less expensive. Then in April when we wake up we will need about three weeks to binge watch catchup TV. The one thing that is predictable is that the politicians will be saying exactly the same things next April as they will be saying when we happily hibernate in October. I don't know about you but I am feeling sleepy already. Oh and don't forget you will get a six month break from reading this Rubbish.


This week Joe made an important speech that you may or may not agree with but it was at least well constructed and well thought out. The reply from the ex leader of the free world Donald said that Joe "must be insane" or "suffering from dementia". That for me tells you everything about these two men. No doubt you have agreed or disagreed with some of the things that both men have said but if you can only reply with insults, there can be only one winner.


Just a Thought:


Many people are like a hibernating bear, hard to awaken and fond of honey.


Better to let someone think you are an idiot than open your mouth and prove it.


A detective called at our house and asked me where I was between 5 and 6. I told him - infants school.


Brian

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