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brianmate

I Have Some Good News........I Think

Hi Everyone



Sadly, some of the illegal immigrants crossing the Channel from France in small boats are children traveling alone in a desperate search for a new life. This week we found out what the real attraction was when they reached our shores. On arrival, they are taken to a special reception centre where they are protected and processed before being moved on to other locations. The problem was that the Hostel that welcomed them had murals of Mickey Mouse and other cartoon characters painted on the walls. Now our Minister for Immigration has decided that these murals should be painted over as it gives the impression that we are being too welcoming. Apparently the staff at the hostel, quite rightly were appalled at this pettiness and resisted the idea but our man in Parliament exerted his authority and the murals have now been removed. If the murals were thought to be too welcoming, which is a crackpot idea, the sort of action that makes us a laughingstock around the world, perhaps they should be replaced with our comedy duo Rishi and the Minister of Immigration. That just might persuade them to return to their own countries.



I was talking recently to someone who was obviously, like me, approaching middle age. We found that we had something in common as when we were teenagers we had both owned a scooter. My obvious question to him then was "Were you a Lambretta man or a Vespa man?". Those were the two iconic Italian made scooters of the 1950s and 60s. Lambretta was considered the better of the two and we both had a Lambretta. I could not remember if that made us Mods or Rockers but of course, we were mods as it was those greasy motorbike riders who were rockers.

It seems hard to believe now that, back then groups of mods and rockers would meet up at seaside towns in the summer with fights and violence and the police making arrests.

That was not our scene of course and in 1956 Dot and I planned a holiday on the south coast in Devon. The problem was that I still had learner plates which meant that I could only ride alone unless the passenger had passed their test. Although I had already passed my car driving test, my test was booked for the day before we were due to leave for our holiday. Fortunately, I passed and we started the following day on our 11 hours 230 mile journey, the first of thousands of mile our trusty Lambretta safely took us on over the next almost ten years. Although we are both now approaching middle age I like to think that we are both still Mods. Those were the days.


This week our grandaughter, her friends, and even her Mum are mobilized for action with their laptops, phones, fingers, and most important of all, their credits card at the ready. They will be joined by thousands, or is it millions of others battling to spend what seems like a fortune to us, to travel anywhere just to be at one of her sixteen shows in the UK next year by Taylor Swift. Now if you are approaching middle age you just might be saying "who" but I can assure you that inflation, the energy crisis, and soaring mortgage costs will be out of the window in the scramble to get just that one ticket. Just think that in the 1960s we saw the wonderful Count Basie band with Tony Bennett in Manchester for £7-50. Now those were the days.


Just a Thought:


Why doesn't Albania have an Olympic Games team? Because everybody who can run, jump, or swim are already here in the UK.


My friend has just got a Senior Citizen scooter. It does 30 aisles an hour.


My friend's lazy eye has now spread to the rest of his body.


Brian


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